You are at that point in your life where all your friends are married or about to tie the knot, and then on the other side of the street, there you are at home with your cat, still getting the whole bed to yourself and getting to do whatever you want. But you are so damn exhausted of the one question asked various ways from your aunt to friends to strangers you meet at work, “are you married?”, “when are you getting married?”, and the most accusatory, “why aren’t you married yet?”
Sophie Sanders is a singer-songwriter from Nashville and released her debut album Steep and Shining Spaces in late 2018; a collection of poetic songs set against a sonically luscious ambience, which brings to mind front porches in the spring as the magnolia is about to bloom, hardwood floors at night, and open blue skies.
Sanders has now taken the frustration all of us 30-somethings face and has channelled it into her new song ‘All My Friends Are Married’.
An anti-Valentine’s anthem about watching all your friends get married and the ease that comes with finally finding your person, against the difficulty of just trying to find the one “normal” single guy at the wedding reception to dance with (preferably one that doesn’t practice taxidermy in his parent’s basement).
i got my dreams got my cat/ and lord i’d like to share all that/ but my prospects are gettin’ scary/ and All My Friends Are Married
‘All My Friends Are Married’ has a softness and languidness to it, but also a humour, a combination that has become Sanders signature. The song was produced by Paul Sikes who Sanders credits with helping her create a whole sonic world for the song after only hearing her guitar and vocals.
“It was interesting for me to hear because I do feel like the overall tone of this finished product is slightly more melancholy than the song sounds when I play it myself. But there’s enough movement and enough funny moments along the way to keep a light-hearted undertone. I think the meow at the end especially reminds the listener to laugh at the situation. Paul has the greatest instinct for what vibe to create, so I wanted to let him carry the track where he saw fit. And I’m glad I did!”
it’s dancin’ solo drunk on bubbles/ 29 i feel the struggle / where to turn where to go/ how to stay sane on my own
Sanders penned the track alone early one morning soon after turning twenty-eight. “I actually had a lot of fun writing it, despite the sad sounding words,” she laughs, explaining that she made herself twenty-nine so that the vowels would rhyme in the chorus. She says she had recently attended a friend’s wedding and was the only single one in her handful of friends there. “Everyone’s like oh that groomsman is single, go for him! And oh my gosh is Christina drinking sparkling water? Oh my gosh are they pregnant?” she says.
‘All My Friends Are Married’ might be inherently light-hearted and full of references to cats (Sanders’ cat even makes a cameo at the end of the song), but it also speaks to that frustration and fear of time passing you rapidly by whilst everyone seems to be on track and meeting that deadline no one told you about.
all my nights are cold/ they tell me we’re still young/ but they’re all actin’ old and it’s gettin’ old